September 17, 2017

HURRICANE HOT DOGS

FROM NORTH AMERICA SYNDICATE, 300 W 57th STREET, 41st FLOOR, NEW YORK, NY 10019
CUSTOMER SERVICE: (800) 708-7311 EXT. 23
FOR RELEASE FRIDAY, SEPT. 15, 2017
BY BOB FRANKEN
HURRICANE HOT DOGS
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Amid all the hurricane stories about dangers and human suffering, I find it necessary to focus on an issue that invariably comes up during these stormy times: There always are people out there who ridicule us TV reporters when we stand in the extreme wind and rain and shriek our live shots over the roar of the wind. You might think that’s insignificant, but then perhaps you’re not familiar with every television correspondent’s axiom: “It’s all about me.”
As compelling as that belief is, it’s not our only motivation. But it’s a biggie. Take it from me, because I’ve ventured out in quite a number of blizzards, hurricanes, tropical storms and tropical depressions. (By the way, I’ve often wondered whether a tropical depression is the melancholy some people experience around palm trees. But I digress.) Having weathered the storms, so to speak, I possibly can provide some insights: First of all, you can disregard the Saffir-Simpson scale of wind velocities. I’ve developed a much simpler way to gauge whether it’s too dangerous out there: If the winds are bl;owing so hard that they cause my hair to fly around after I’ve sprayed it into the usual helmet, then this is probably too hazardous, particularly for us 8-by-10 glossies, unless, of course, the competition has ventured into this tempestuous maw. More about that in a moment.

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September 12, 2017

NFL BOYCOTT

FROM NORTH AMERICA SYNDICATE, 300 W 57th STREET, 41st FLOOR, NEW YORK, NY 10019
CUSTOMER SERVICE: (800) 708-7311 EXT. 236
FOR RELEASE TUESDAY, SEPT. 12, 2017
BY BOB FRANKEN

NFL BOYCOTT

I did it! I made it through Sunday without watching any NFL game! Perhaps I didn’t mention it, but I’ve decided to boycott the National Football League. It’s not an easy decision for me. I played football. Come to think of it, that might explain my mental acuity (or lack thereof). But I’ve had a lifetime attachment to the game. Until now. At least I won’t be watching the pros play on TV, and certainly not in person. That’s become way too expensive.
The reason for my shunning the NFL can be explained in two words. You can probably guess them. No, not those two words. I’m talking about Colin Kaepernick, the quarterback who isn’t -- isn’t on any pro squad in spite of the fact that he is way more qualified than many of the others who’ve at least hung on as backups.
By now you know the reason why; Kaepernick created quite an uproar last year when he was with the San Francisco 49ers. He chose not to stand during the playing of “The Star-Spangled Banner.” He explained that it was his way of expressing opposition to the sometimes deadly police brutality on so many occasions aimed at minorities and the mistreatment in general of the poor and people of color.
Kaepernick, obviously, doesn’t fit the stereotype of the dumb, oblivious jock. Nor does he comply with the regimented, go-along-with-the-program mandate that’s implicit in professional sports. So in spite of crushing pressure to abandon his protest, he refused. He continued to sit out and, finally, kneel out during the national anthem. Imagine the abuse he got. It showered down from people who said it deeply offended their sense of patriotism and particularly those who are severely antagonized by anti-law-enforcement expressions like Black Lives Matter.
At the end of last year, Kaepernick decided to become a free agent, to leave the 49ers and to try to sign a more lucrative contract with another team. But guess what? No other organization would have anything to do with him. In spite of his obvious talents and record, including a Super Bowl appearance as the starting quarterback, Kaepernick was not hired by any franchise, even those who developed a dire need for quarterback help.

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September 11, 2017

STORMY WEATHER

FROM NORTH AMERICA SYNDICATE, 300 W 57th STREET, 41st FLOOR, NEW YORK, NY 10019
CUSTOMER SERVICE: (800) 708-7311 EXT. 236
FOR RELEASE FRIDAY, SEPT. 8, 2017
BY BOB FRANKEN

STORMY WEATHER

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What a crying shame it is that it takes a calamity for Americans, in particular our leaders, to rally around and do the right thing together. The spirit of unity is then quickly forgotten, and we once again dissolve into bickering, or much worse, which threatens our very sense of national community.

So it is that the catastrophes of Harvey, Irma and other pending natural disasters have shamed us into narrowly avoiding the civic disasters that were about to consume the barely United States. It’s almost like the catastrophic hurricane winds blew away petty political concerns and created a momentary atmosphere of cooperation. Perhaps it’s that chagrin that caused President Donald Trump and our congressional leaders to abandon their normally embarrassing misconduct and agree to temporarily avoid the chaos that would be caused by a partial shutdown of our federal government -- just when it’s most needed for storm rescue -- and also to shove aside the typical demagoguery and approve an increase in the debt ceiling.

Usually, the perennial candidates who run things like to dabble in precipitous bluster before doing what’s necessary to raise the borrowing limit. Our government was on the brink of being unable to pay for its vital functions and suffering the degradation of sovereign debt default. So it looks like the weather fiascos are acting as catalysts to prevent economic fiascos.

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September 4, 2017

MSNBC CANCELLED

The MSNBC news gods have just cancelled my appearance this morning because of various breaking developments. Go back to sleep. I am.



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HUMANITY AND INHUMANITY

MSNBC LABORING

NOTHING IS UNPARDONABLE

THE TWO DONALDS

STATUE STATUS

ALT UNIVERSE

"MANY SIDES"

DOWN IN THE "FIRE AND FURY" FLAMES

ACRID ACRONYMS

THE THEME SCENE

TRUMP'S RUSSIAN COMEDY

MCCONNELL'S HEALTH CARE MANIPULATIONS

THE BF BS REPORT

TWITTER DEPENDENCE DAY

Pre Independence on MSNBC

A HELPING HAND

POTUS AND HIS PEEPS

THE HUNDRED DAY SHAM

AWFUL QUESTIONS, NO ANSWERS

AMERICA'S PASTIMES

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